Grief Writing and how it can help
By writing down our thoughts, we sense "Our loved one is still available to us! Not as before...Now different...
- When suffering from death of someone close, pain is valid.
- There is now a "physical" separation.
- In a way, one could say that with the absence of the physical body, the relationship could be enhanced because there is nothing standing between them and true communication of the heart.
- No misunderstandings!
It is up to us to make ourselves available to this new way of "being together". be open; believe that your words and thoughts are capable of being known instantly.
LOV is stronger than death...LOV continues...
Write, write, write, and then write some more.
The Power of writing one's thoughts can heal.
- One way to get beyond this area of the physical form is to write.
- Writing is a simple, yet powerful way to "work" through the feelings.
- Writing can be useful to relieve some of the physical, emotional and spiritual pain.
- Writing also aids in working through many of the issues, which are difficult to communicate in other ways.
- Writing is personal and confidential.
- Writing one's feelings on paper helps to get in touch with just what the feelings are.
- Writing is simple and spontaneous.
- Grief writing does not require making complicated plans, it
can be accomplished in the very moment the emotions arrive, when
they are at their strongest and the need to connect is the greatest.
Many agree with this, however do not know where or how to begin.
- One of the best ways of releasing pain is to write about it.
- Writing of the pain and loss can be a powerful tool helping to release emotions.
- Sometimes these emotions are locked up.
- Writing can release anger just by being able to vent it.
Use phrases like "I remember" or "I feel".
- Begin by getting comfortable.
- Write on something you enjoy.
- Make an appointment to begin.
- Discipline one's self to write.
MORE reasons to write...
- Write about the good times, the bad times, the happy times and the sad times.
- Write about thinking. Allow the emotions to flow.
- Be free to say whatever you want to say, IT IS PRIVATE.
- Do not worry about punctuation!
- If the tears fall, let them -- it's OK. Tears are a human response to pain. It is cleansing and healing. Sometimes we all need to allow ourselves to collapse into the tears, releasing our fears and pain.
- Do not worry if tears do not come, that is OK TOO! It does not mean that you care less if you did not cry many tears.
What has happened since the death? How have things changed?
- To reminisce a memory.
- To confront an issue.
- To vent.
- To connect.
- To atone.
- To preserve a thought.
- To memorialize a thought.
- Special memories and the relationship are experienced together.
- Life's lessons that they taught you.
- Remember their life and write about it.
WRITE ABOUT THESE THINGS
- Did you feel shocked, or want to withdraw from everybody?
- Did you have anger towards the deceased or others?
- Did you feel guilty?
- Has the sadness frozen you, made you feel numb, or do you have a new physical pain?
What has helped thus far?
Remember their life and write about that.
Write about the fact that you are a new person, and this loss has changed you in ways you could have never imagined.
- This rejuvenates our life and keeps the memory of our loved one ALIVE!
Make a list of all your feelings and learn to express them
Write LOV Letters
- For example: I feel sad that ---, until you run out of one feeling, then move on to the next feeling. I feel mad that ---, scared that ---. Do this until you run out of energy about the feelings.
- Write a Poison Pen Letter if necessary. Remember, this is not for ANYONE else to read.